Never Say Never…

A week ago my friend Stephanie told me that she joined weight watchers. I rolled my eyes. Why? Because I don’t think she has any weight to lose, and because….I pretty much think weight watchers is bull. I bad mouth weight watchers constantly, ok not constantly but enough. So then Steph told me that she was looking for online support, and was thinking of adding her journey on WW as a weekly feature on her blog. And for some totally insane reason I said, “Hey! Why don’t I join you and we can both make it a weekly feature on our blogs?!?” And she said “YES I LOVE IT” and I thought to myself…what in the HELL was I thinking?

Steph and I at a friend's wedding....being goofy.

And since that day, a week ago….I’ve been trying to reason with myself what exactly possessed me to say such a thing.
I’ve come down to two conclusions, and yes I realize that they are contradictory. I contradict myself…all.the.time.
1). I want to lose weight. I know this. I want to lose 20-30 pounds to be the weight I was at in college. I want to lose this weight for both vanity and health reasons. I would love to wear clothes 1-2 sizes smaller than I do now, and I want to be just a little less fluffy around the middle. I want to not only look good in pictures, but if and when the day comes that we chose to have a family, I want to be in the best shape possible.
2). I don’t believe in the diet industry, I believe in Health at Every Size (see, contradictory to wanting to lose weight). BUT, I’ve always had this sort of fascination with weight watchers, because darn if every person I know whose tried it hasn’t lost weight while using it. So…I want to see if I can use the system, stay “on plan” and “in my points” while not sacrificing good tasting food, and not making choices that I feel come from a an unhealthy place mentally.

It should also be mentioned that I REFUSE to eat any diet food. Example: Skinny Cow ice cream, Weight Watchers yogurts or cake. I want to eat the real food that I know my body wants.

I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t eat the correct portion sizes of food, and I’m hoping that this journey will sort of open my eyes and guide me in the right direction.

Stephanie and I will be weighing in and updating our blogs weekly, every Friday with thoughts on the week, as well as our progress. I have decided that I am not going to publish my current weight, I’m just going to post my gain or loss. While I truly believe that weight is just a number, and it has no moral value, and doesn’t reflect my worth as a person….I just can’t seem to be ok with putting it out there. (Again with the contradictions!)

So with out further ado:
I weighed in this morning and the scale shows a……GAIN! Of 1.5 pounds

Official Weigh in:
September 3: + 1.5 lbs. and 0.5 over my allotted points for the week. (Damn that beer!)

So maybe going out for wings and beer the night before a weigh in is bad? Ok, I only ate a few wings, and 1 beer….but do you know how points are in chicken wings? Seriously.

I don’t actually think I’ve gained a pound and a half. I cheated and stepped on the scale 2 days ago, and showed neither a gain nor loss, so I’m chalking this almost 2 pound gain up to the copious amounts of sodium I ingested yesterday, and the presence of my period.

We’ll see what next week brings……

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