As big as a…

When you get pregnant, a whole new world on the internet opens up. Forums, blogs, weekly updates, baby registries, amazon mom, etc. One of the things that I find most fascinating, and disturbing are weekly updates that include a “your baby is as big as a…” information. Some of the updates use food. For example, this week my baby was as big as an apple, or 4 inches from crown to rump. Next week, according to that same site my baby will be as big as an avocado, or 4.5 inches long. In my grocery store apples are usually bigger than avocados. Whatever. I found one site that said “eff it” to the fruit/veggie comparison and compares to desserts. In which case my baby is the size of a package of skittles, which is infinitely more fun than an apple!

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In the beginning…

So, I found out I was pregnant when I was only 3 weeks along. Thank you Fertility Awareness Method. I didn’t feel different, I didn’t feel sick, I didn’t feel anything.

Then week 6 rolled in. Ha. Instant symptoms. Nausea, food aversions, cooking aversions, extreme fatigue. Let me tell you, trimester one, is super fun. I have to admit, I felt pretty hopeless, and despondent during this time. I likened it to having the flu, except that saltines and 7up didn’t make me feel better, and it didn’t go away in 48 hours, or 72 hours. It was here to stay for at LEAST six more weeks.

I remember during my sister-in-law’s pregnancy, thinking it was going by so quickly. Ha! To the pregnant person, while in the throes of morning sickness, those first 12, 13,14 weeks (no one is quite clear on when exactly the first trimester is over) seem INTERMINABLE.

Prior to my pregnancy I was a paleo eater. 90% of the time I didn’t eat grains, dairy, sugar, or legumes. I did eat lots of meat, fruit and veggies, and healthy fats.
I kissed ALL of that good bye during my first trimester when all I wanted was to not feel like crap, or gag on my food. I did think about the negative ways my body was reacting to the inflammatory foods that it was no longer used to, but when the only thing that didn’t make me dry heave was toast with butter, then toast with butter it was. Gotta have SOME nutrients for the cooking baby. The worst part of my pregnancy so far, has been my aversion to cooking. I LOVE to cook, and to cook interesting dishes with interesting spices. Right about week 6, I stopped being able to stomach the thought of cooking meat. I could microwave, and that is about it. I also, stopped being able to eat salad. I love salad. Prior to pregnancy I would eat a HUGE salad with delicious protein and fat every day for lunch. During the first tri? Looking at lettuce made me gag.

Interestingly enough, I think I only gained about 4 pounds in my first trimester. I did not lose 10 pounds like some plus size women, and I think that is because I actually was already a healthy eater, and eating was the ONLY thing that kept the nausea at bay. This pregnancy thing man, it’s a bear.

As for exercise in my first tri, I was still exercising almost every day. I walked my dog about 1.5 miles most mornings, although there were some mornings where .6 of a mile (1 loop in our subdivision) was all I could manage, before I had to come home and lay on the couch until it was time for me to take a shower. I continued to take Kettlebell class as my schedule allowed, and I found that around week 7, things just felt different. Lots of crazy things happen during pregnancy that affect you, did you know that you have double the amount of blood in your body while you are pregnant? And, man…I could feel those changes. I did not follow what seems to be the “typical” advice regarding exercise and pregnancy. I continued to lift as heavy as my body would allow (being careful to not lift ANY heavier than I had pre-pregnancy) but lots of days, I went down in weight, at least for my heaviest weight. I did not worry if my heart rate went above 140, I just worked out, to the best of my abilities. And the working out helped with the morning sickness, at least for those 50 minute spurts when I was working out, it would usually return immediately afterwards.

And now? Now I am 14 weeks pregnant, and I feel like I have turned the proverbial corner. I feel better, and I even managed to look at a pan of meat on the stove with out gagging.

So, we are all caught up in my timeline. From here on out I think I will probably do some sort of weekly update (undecided on the posting of “bump” pictures) and other posts about my eating, cooking, and working out.

Oh yeah, and sometime in the near future I’ll move to Wyoming. I’m sure that adventure will factor in here as well.

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oh. I have a blog. right.

I see the last time I posted was March. oops.
March marks the beginning of my “busy” season at work. I have no time to blog during work, which is probably against company policy as it is, and by the time I get home the LAST thing I want to do is sit in front of the computer.

But now? Now it’s winter….and everything has changed. Not just in work, but in life.

Big Change the first: My husband got at promotion that includes a transfer. To Wyoming. Wy-oooooo you have got to be kidding me—ming. Well…you gotta do what you gotta do right? Well, he took the promotion and he moved to Wyoming three weeks ago. Yep, you read that right, he moved to Wyoming, as in, I did not, and he did. I will be moving in the near future. We had to get our house ready to rent, and to be quite frank I have a good job…and well..that brings us to big change number two..

Big Change the Second: I’m pregnant. Yep. Totally unexpected. I am 13.5 weeks pregnant, and well….I thought it would be a good time to start blogging again.
With my husband living in WY and me living with my in-laws (not kidding, but it’s all good, they are great and the rent is free), the blog will be a good outlet for me.
Plus, I think that this is a good way to remember my pregnancy.

So how is this going to work into my current (or rather old) blog? I am not planning on this turning into a mommy blog solely. I would like to talk about having a plus size pregnancy that involves exercise and an attempt at healthy eating (first trimester? not so healthy, I was in survival mode).

So, I guess, start expecting regular (hopefully) posts from me again. At least for the next 6 months, I suppose once the baby comes all bets are off.
Also, I do plan on using this blog to update my family on my pregnancy and probably the life of my child, so while i don’t intend to join the ranks of official “mommy bloggers” I Feel like for the first year of your child’s life, it’s hard to seperate.

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Whole 30: Completed!

Whole30: Recap

Well, I did it. 30 whole days with no grains, no sugar, no dairy, no legumes, Etc. Wow. Honestly….6 months ago, if you had told me I could and WOULD do this, I would have told you to check yourself into a looney bin, cause there was NO way! No.Way.

But, I did it. And I think it was made easier by the fact that I was eating mostly paleo for 3 months prior. “Mostly” is generous. I had cut out bread and pasta and rice, but was still eating desserts and dairy and some grains here and there.

I posted on the Whole30 website earlier today, some of my experiences with the program.

1). Weight- I lost 5 pounds. This is good for me. I didn’t count any calories, and I really didn’t watch my portion sizes, and to be honest… I probably ate too many nuts. When I started this program, I decided that my first Whole30 I wanted to focus on cutting out all of the wrong things, and keeping or adding in all of the right things. My 2nd Whole30 will focus on the proportions of all of the right things. I didn’t take my measurements, but all of my clothes are loser, some of my pants to the point of rediculousness.

2) Strength-I feel strong. You know how you feel when you haven’t been working out, and you can just feel you self softening up? I don’t feel that way. I did a little bit right before my period, but I’m chalking that up to time of the month bloating. I didn’t notice much of a faster recovery time after training, but I did notice that I was able to move up to heavier weights in just about all of my kettlebell sessions.

3) My relationship with food—the big one. I am and always have been an emotional eater. When I was emoting and eating at the same time…I always reached for sugar. Being able to resist sugar, and just see it for what it is. A type of caloric substance. Neither good nor bad, not a solver of issues, not something that Not something to eat too much of, and then hide that behavior from others. Not something to grab out of the office candy dish on my way to a meeting. Not something to reach for when I am stressed out. Just…a thing. It’s huge. It’s huge for me that last night when my husband ordered dessert to go at our favorite restaurant. I didn’t eat it. Even though I only had a few hours of my Whole30 left. I didn’t immediately reach for it this morning. It was just in our fridge, doing the same thing as all of the other food…waiting for me to grab it when I chose to, not because I can’t control my sugar demons. Although, I am planning on having a few bits of it tonight as a treat. It’s flourless deconstructed german chocolate cake from this restaurant my favorite local restaurant. It is definitely on my Health/F-Off Scale.

4) I already posted about how the Whole30 affected some of my bodily functions.

So did it change my life? In a word: yes. It solidified a way of eating for me that I plan on continuing for the rest of my life. I woke up this morning, with the knowledge that I could now chose (and I suppose could have chosen on my Whole30 as well) any food that I wanted for breakfast. What did I have? Sweet potato and turkey hash scrambled with two eggs. I did cook my eggs in butter instead of coconut oil, but that is only because the coconut oil I bought most recently has a weird smell when I cook with it. I accidentally bought refined instead of un-refined. The butter hasn’t had an affect on me.

From here I plan on seeing if my body will tolerate minimal amounts of diary and grains. Not so I can add them in on a regular basis (ok maybe butter and cream—but only in recipes), but so I can chose how what foods to eat and enjoy when I feel like eating something that isn’t part of my normal routine. I like getting frozen yogurt with fruit and nuts as a weeknight treat with my husband, and I like cheese. Lord help me, I LOVE cheese. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a really good caprese salad on a summer evening? Yum.
I really didn’t want to use Whole30 as just a weight loss tool, or just a “thing” I was doing for 30 days, only to go back to the S.A.D diet. It’s a way of life now.

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Whole30: The TMI edition

Ok. Today is the 30th day of my Whole30, and while I plan on doing a bigger write-up tomorrow, I want to write today about some stuff that happened with my body during the Whole30. This is not exactly what people normally post about on their blogs, but this is my blog….and I’m going to.
Fair Warning: I am going to be talking about going to the bathroom and my period. Stop reading now if that freaks you out.

So, on to it.

Prior to starting the whole30 I thought my digestive health was normal. I went to the bathroom regularly, and didn’t really experience anything that I thought wasn’t average. On the whole30….a lot changed! For the first umm…28 days, things were moving alot more quickly through my system. I would get the sudden urge to use the restroom, and needed to go with-in minutes of that feeling coming on. In the last day or so let’s just say that things have slowed down and firmed up a little bit.

The only exception was on day 27 when I accidentally ate a white potato. It was hiding in a salad that I had made myself (we were out to eat, it was free burger day, the only thing you could get was a burger and fries–I gave my bun and potatoes to my husband and had made myself a “salad” out of my burger, and condiments from the restaurants condiment bar–ice berg, tomato, onion, pickles etc). After eating that potato, that night I was totally and painfully backed up. It was the only thing I ate that day that was not normal for my Whole30. I had even had burgers at this restaurant before.

Also, during my Whole30 I noticed that I was much, much, much less gassy. Markedly so. I had always thought that red meat was the culprit of my gas, but I see now, that isn’t the case at all!

Ok, on to monthly hormonal fluctuations.
A bit of history. I have been getting my period for 16 years. For the first 7.75 of those years, I was not on the pill, and experienced regular, heavy periods with what I will call a medium amount of cramps. The last quarter of the 7th year, I started getting horrible, horrible cramps. Debilitating, I can hardly breathe sharp pains. I got on the pill and stayed on it for almost 8 more years. On the pill I went back to having medium cramps with my period.
In october of 2010 I went off the pill, and immediately the horrible cramps came back. They would only last for a day or two, but they were bad.
Enter the Whole30. I started my period on day 24 or something like that. I had ONE day of MINIMAL cramping. The least I have had in my entire life. I have to assume that this is related to my eating habits on the Whole30, as I have not changed anything else in the last 30 days.

So there ya have it….Whole30 and below the belt. 🙂
Non-TMI posting to resume tomorrow.

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The New Normal

Today is day 25 of my Whole30.

I know that I have just been recapping my days, but today I want to talk about what I did to myself on Day 23.
I forced myself to eat dessert. Now….it was “technically” Whole30 approved, since it was just frozen bananas and a spalsh of coconut milk put into my food processor to make “soft-serve ice cream.” If you have have never done this…do it today. Unless you are doing a Whole30. Or even if you are…just do it for the right reason.

I had it for the wrong reason. In my life, every night after eating dinner…I want dessert. Or I did. Until I kicked my sugar cravings with the Whole30. NOT wanting dessert every night after dinner (and let’s be honest…any time I am: bored, lonely, sad, happy, etc) is the biggest change I have seen in myself since starting my 30 days. Of course the first couple of days I wanted dessert so badly that I was craving things I don’t normally eat, even when I DO eat dessert. But it subsided around day 5. Some time around day 14 I started…and I know this is going to sound wierd….wanting to want dessert. I would think about it during the day at work. I would have this conversation with myself. “Oooh! tonight after dinner you can eat some berries with coconut milk, or make banana soft-serve. Cause you will be wanting dessert and those are Whole30 approved choices!” Please don’t get me wrong…I’ve read what the good folks at Whole9 say about eating dessert like foods when your body is telling you to give it sugar…I recognize it’s not the point of the Whole30.
So, then I would get home and start making a delcious paleo Whole30 dinner, and I’d think…”yes! after this I am totally going to make banana soft-serve.” but then…I never would. I just didn’t want it. And then…around day 20 I started getting annoyed at myself for NOT wanting it. WTF? seriously?

So finally on day 23 I decided, I am going to do it. I am going to have banana soft-serve because I know, I KNOW that I want it. So I made it for myself, the whole time ignoring the voice inside that was quietly telling me, “you don’t actually want this, you know.” And I ate that ice cream, and it was delicious.
And I didn’t feel guiltly, or beat myself up. The only thing I was thinking was, “Wow. this is pretty good, but I’m not quite sure why I am eating it…because I didn’t really want it.” In fact it has taken me two days to sort of think through it.

I’m not sure why I felt like I NEEDED to want dessert. Because that was normal for me?
My Whole30 will be complete next wednesday, but I think what I’ve learned this week, is that my journey to my “new normal” is just starting. I won’t wake up on Day 31 and say “aha! I have perfected my eating habits and now I will the picture of health.” But…I will have made a good start, and I’m ready for the rest of the journey.

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Whole30: Days 15-21

Wow. Today is day 22 of my Whole30!

Days 15- 21 flew by, and crawled by at the same time. I feel ready to get on with it. I feel impatient with 30 days….although apparently not to impatient, since I am now feeling surprised that I am nearing the end of my 30 days. I am looking forward to figuring out what my new normal is going to be. What foods will I add back in, and at what frequency? What affect/effect will dairy/grains/sugars have?

Yesterday was a wierd food day for me. My co-worker brought in some left over birthday cake, and all day I walked past it feeling nothing. Until I was hungry at 5 o’clock. I had a meeting at 6pm, and while I had a snack, I was still a little hungry…but by no means starving. I wanted a piece of cake. I didn’t have one though….and later that night after I had had my dinner of vegetables and proteins, I noticed that I wasn’t craving sugar at all. So my need for the cake was truly in my head.

Really not much exciting to update. Just keepin on, keepin on. Look for my Whole30 wrap up post nex Thursday.

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Whole30:Days 11-14


Well, today is day 15. I am officially half way through my first Whole30. I can’t believe it really. I know that I shouldn’t focus so much on day 30, because I’ve already come to the realization that this was the launch of a major diet over-haul for me, and that for the most part I will continue eating as I have been during the Whole30, but with cheats thrown in.

Days 11-14 were interesting. I wanted to quit. Not because I was craving things, but because I wasn’t craving them. I felt done. I felt accomplished. Goal achieved, I have conquered my food devils. But…I know that isn’t the case. 14 days is not long enough to rid my system of the junk.
So, here I am on day 15, still at it…with 14.5 full days left to go.

On Saturday my mom and I had a long chat about Paleo eating. It stemmed from a facebook discussion that had occured between me, my mom and my brother on facebook. (Side note: I am so proud of my brother, I think he is a total bad-ass). My mom had never really been introduced to Paleo eating, even though both my brother and I have been gradually moving towards that life-style recently.

My mom started dieting in the 70’s with Weight Watchers and hasn’t ever really looked back. Typical American yo-yo up and down try different things dieter. I told her about Paleo/Primal and gave her some websites to read as resources. I also talked to her about the Whole30. She checked out the Whole30 website prior to our conversation and had some questions for me. Her biggest question was, what is “their” plan for after the 30 days. She really had a hard time wrapping her mind around Paleo as a “lifestyle” as opposed to a plan (again, serial Weight Watcher). I don’t think she is quite ready to jump head-long into a Whole30, or really to even give up bread. A direct quote from her ” Well..I found this other book that said sprouted grains are ok–I just don’t want to give up bread.” I didn’t push it. It took me 3 months of exploring primal/paleo and eating that way about 75% of the time before I jumped on the Whole30 band wagon.
But, I’m excited for her to even check it out. My dad’s thoughts? “Anything that is a proponent of butter is ok by me!.”

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Today is day 10 of my Whole30. I know that I still have 20 days left to go, but I sort of feel like I woke up and BAM it was day 10! Which is better than how I was feeling on days 2 and 3 when I wanted to throw myself a pity party.

Days 7-10:
Have been pretty sweet. Like I updated the other day, my sugar cravings have gone away (for the most part). Last night my husband wanted to go out for frozen yogurt, at one of those build your own type places. I went with him and put fresh fruit and nuts in my cup. When we got home I put coconut milk over it. I thought about the Whole30 guidelines, and not giving in to my “sugar tantrums” but I was ok with my choice. I made it because I genuinely wanted that to eat, and had had a small dinner. I wasn’t doing it because my head or my mouth was telling me to give it sugar. Today I’m not feeling any ill-effects. I am however, not only faced with these left over donuts:

bad picture angle, but there are three donuts hiding in there!

but also with Girl Scout cookies in our break room. I have to walk past our breakroom anytime I want to leave my cubicle. I am not really having a hard time resisting the sugar in the Girl Scout cookie….it’s more a sentimenal thing. I spent my entire child and young adult-hood as a Girl Scout…so the organization is special to me. But….the cookies aren’t. and truth be told…I HATED seeling Girl Scout cookies as a kid…eating them is another story.

Anyway…day 10 and I’m holding strong. Tonight we are going out to Buffalo Wild Wings with some friends. I already know that I can order plain grilled chicken and I plan to add that to a side salad. This will also be the first time that we have been out to eat with friends since I started the Whole30. Maybe an opportunity for a little food evangelism?

Did you guys know that March is national nutrition month? I did, but only because I sit on the Wellness Committee at work. This month I had to hang up a poster in our break area that listed the 30 healthiest foods–plenty of fruits and veggies listed but also, of course, non-fat milk, quinoa, oats, and whole wheat bread.
Melissa of this fantastic blog is doing a series during national nutrition month, called “National REAL Nutrition Month.” Check it out…it’s awesome!

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coming “clean”

No reason for this picture...other than I love these mountains!

I don’t really have a cohesive post today, just a mish-mash of thoughts. I’ll make a list.

1) Today is day 8 of my Whole30! Day 8. Hooray! And I feel…fine. I feel normal. I sort of have to think about how I used to feel to know if I feel different. I haven’t had a headache in a few days, and I’m less congested, and waking up is really easy.

2) Tomorrow is our monthly all-staff meeting. Each month someone on staff makes a “treat” for everyone else to celebrate people who have a birthday that month. Months and months ago I volunteered to make this month’s treat. The irony right? In times past I would have been scouring the internet for something to bring…a delicious twist on a classic. But this month? I don’t really care, which is strange. I’ve always sort of prided myself on my baking skills. I sort of want to buy a bag of store bought cookies, and put them on a platter, which my previous self would have considered blasphemous.
Is it blasphemous now to serve my co-workers stuff that I 100% believe to be absolutely horrible for you?

3) which brings me to sugar cravings. I have none. Which is new and almost wierd. Last night I felt myself reaching for some frozen fruit with cocont milk, because I was sure I was craving sugar. I stopped for a moment, and realized I wasn’t craving it in the slightest.

4) This is a pretty useless post. 🙂

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